I Knew
I knew at 11,
when the high school choir came to sing for my school
and all my friends were talking about the cute older boys,
but I couldn’t take my eyes off of the blonde girl wearing black suspenders.
I knew at 13,
when the idea of kissing my first boyfriend didn’t just make me nervous,
but also made me feel a bit uncomfortable.
We never did kiss.
I knew at 16,
when in the middle of losing my virginity I began to cry
and my boyfriend didn’t stop,
regardless of my tears.
I knew every time I slept with a man
and he’d get frustrated,
because I wouldn’t wrap my mouth around his manhood.
I knew at 18,
when my college of choice suddenly seemed like a trap
because of it’s small town location
and overwhelming high school vibe.
I think my friends suspected
every time I went on one of my “feminist” rants
or talked about how aesthetically pleasing women are.
I knew at 22,
when directly after getting engaged,
my fiancé and I began to spend the majority of our time fighting
and I suddenly realized it couldn’t be fixed.
I knew at 22,
when I came out
and each time I told a new person,
I felt just a little more liberated.
I knew at 22,
when I went to the local gay bar
and got giddy because
a pretty girl asked for my number.
I always knew…
what a sweet little poem :’)
I Knew
I knew at 11,
when the high school choir came to sing for my school
and all my friends were talking about the cute older boys,
but I couldn’t take my eyes off of the blonde girl wearing black suspenders.
I knew at 13,
when the idea of kissing my first boyfriend didn’t just make me nervous,
but also made me feel a bit uncomfortable.
We never did kiss.
I knew at 16,
when in the middle of losing my virginity I began to cry
and my boyfriend didn’t stop,
regardless of my tears.
I knew every time I slept with a man
and he’d get frustrated,
because I wouldn’t wrap my mouth around his manhood.
I knew at 18,
when my college of choice suddenly seemed like a trap
because of it’s small town location
and overwhelming high school vibe.
I think my friends suspected
every time I went on one of my “feminist” rants
or talked about how aesthetically pleasing women are.
I knew at 22,
when directly after getting engaged,
my fiancé and I began to spend the majority of our time fighting
and I suddenly realized it couldn’t be fixed.
I knew at 22,
when I came out
and each time I told a new person,
I felt just a little more liberated.
I knew at 22,
when I went to the local gay bar
and got giddy because
a pretty girl asked for my number.
I always knew…
what a sweet little poem :’)
Posted 2 years ago Notes